I am well on my way to becoming a Belayer. I have finished my "Past, Present and Future" essay, and my application is completely finished. I just need to finish collecting signatures before I turn in my application to Dan Barney (the Program Director) tomorrow.

This morning my friend and I went on the 3 mile walk. We ran about 2 miles of it and then walked back around the one mile campus loop. We had a great time catching up. She just recently came back from her OCC (off campus challenge). Because of running this morning, my knee hurts really bad today, but luckily tomorrow I am going to start physical therapy. I was diagnosed with patellar tendonitis in my right knee. So running/jogging is not the best activity for me to be doing, but I feel like I get the best work out when I do jog.

Today was an "A" day: I had Civics, Independent Spanish 1, Study Hall, and English 12. I love the classes here. They are really at your own pace. It is traditional school, but the teachers take into consideration what the kids' strengths and weaknesses are. They play to the strengths, while also trying to improve the weaknesses. Today we also had a Student Council meeting. It was productive. We got to talk to the AOS senior staff (all of the Directors) about what other kids had told us they wanted to see changed. Interestingly, one of the student council members is no longer on student council, and today we got to see who was going to replace her. I am very happy with who was next in line to join the Student Council Team!

In my program, I feel I have hit the Frustration stage. I am starting to feel overwhelmed with most of the students here. It is very discouraging when you hear your peers picking the flaws out of the majority of their fellow students. To me it is even more discouraging when you hear the same group or groups of kids doing that to a staff member. Whenever I get in the mindset of "So-n-so needs to work harder on his or her program", I try to remember that we are all a family here. We need to help each other out. If someone's program isn't going so strong, we need to help them pick it back up.

I feel a lot of negativity on campus lately. I don't know if I am the only one that senses it, but something tells me that most of the kids just need a break. I think that it would be best if we had a bonding experience. I know that to get me out of the frustration stage I just need to concentrate solely on my program and nothing else. I am trying to lose 12 pounds by Thanksgiving so I can see my family and say that I am less than 200 pounds. That, for me, would be an amazing feeling. I know that if I focus and I really set my mind to it, I can achieve anything. My mom says that I am stubborn, sometimes in a good way, sometimes in a bad way. What she means is that if I put all of my effort into something there is a good chance that I won't let myself fail.

I also have thought to write a "Goal for the Day" in my SMJ (self-monitoring journal) in the "Think and Ink" section. My goal for today is to find something positive about my self, and about one other person. I don't necessarily have to tell that person, but I do have to write it down.

I am taking the first step in becoming more positive for myself, and my community.